3 Indian stories and Journey of values November 10, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in India, Spirituality.Tags: Brotherhood, Ethics, Story, Trust, Values
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Story #1 ( Baba Bharati and value of belief)
Once there lived a saint called Baba Bharati. He had the best horse any body possessed during those times. The name f horse was Sultan and people used to admire the horse for its gait and speed. There was a Bandit named Kharag Singh and having heard great admiration about Sultan wanted to get the horse. He sent multiple proposal to buy horse but Baba Bharati accepted none.
One evening , while Baba was walking the horse , he saw a poor person sitting on side of road . He asked if Baba could help him to reach Doctor. Baba obliged but he hadn’t walked 10 steps that suddenly with force the patient pulled the reins of horse and galloped. This poor guy was no other than Bandit Khadak Singh. He laughed and turned back to Baba and said, : “The most coveted horse in the world now is mine, Do you want to say anything ?”. The Baba replied, “ Please take the horse , I do not claim to be its master anymore. I have just one request : Please don’t tell any one how you got the horse. People will then never help a poor /sick person then “.
The Bandit was struck by enormous sense of guilt. He got down returned the horse and walked away thanking Baba for opening his eyes.
en.girgit.chitthajagat.in
Story #2 ( Akbar and the value of Indian tradition of Rakhi)
Sometime in the Mughal period scores of Muslim soldiers had laid siege to a fort. The citizens were all trapped inside with whatever provisions they had. The attackers were unable to penetrate the fort either. With gradually weakening resistance, the incumbents were finding it tough to hold position. The queen of the fort sent a messenger to Sultan of Delhi ( Akbar) with a Rakhi. This was a proposal to gain his brotherhood. The sultan accepted the proposal and send his troops to guard the fort. This was power of Rakhi.
Story #3( To hell with trust and beliefs , basal pleasures rule )
Somewhere in the 21st century, a spoilt kid of rich doctors in North India failed to do well in any exam. The parents wanted their son to be an Engineer. They had money to send their ward to far off state where money could get admission . They requested a family to take care of their son and become his local guardians. This spoilt guy started visiting the family and to win their trust asked their daughter to tie Rakhi to him. Such is the tradition in India that tieing Rakhi puts the relation at a very high noble plane. Having won the trust , the guy and girl enjoyed the lack of vigil by parents to indulge in romance. Unashamed of the act , the duo then wanted to get married. Enraged parents threatened dire consequences and said this was utterly unacceptable even in thought. The love birds eloped and secretly got married and kept the marriage under wraps.
Emotionally, the girl started to up the ante to tell parents to arrange marriage. Under heavy coercion she admitted that she had already married. The audacity however didn’t end there. She wanted her parents to solemnize the act and do a public marriage. The height is she was also pretty successful at getting everybody to put a stamp of approval on it.
These 3 stories span 3 different time periods . They also profile the Indian value system and where they are heading.
In this yuppie age no one questions the value of brotherhood ( Rakhi ka mol) or murder of trust and benevolence . Bharatendu Harishchandra had said- “ Ha Ha Bharat durdasha dekhi na jaayee( Ahoy, I cant stand seeing the degradation of India )“. Probably , in this world , its impossible to gauge how low morals can fall
5 most disgusting things Congress has done recently September 29, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in India, Leadership, Nationalism.Tags: Congress, Disgrace, India, Politics, Shame
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Politics is venal. Reams of newsprints are wasted profiling the the dirty and not so dirty acts of politicians. Political parties are bigger repulsions . Often people turn zealots defending theri favorite party’s lines. I do not have any political affiliation but have a deep sense of love for my country. The biggest party in India too has been playing very dirty tricks to usurp/hold on to power and also at times bringing Shame to nation.
Here are the 5 most disgusting things ( In my opinion ) Congress has done :
5 Blocked the re election of President Kalaam : Put a nondescript person as President in name of gender. Inspite of exemplary tenure and unpartisan and visionary Presidentship of Kalaam he was denied a second tenure. Just look at what unworthy , undistinguished work his replacement has done in last 1 year besides taking his kins on official tour to further personal business interests and make protocol gaffes
4. Blocking the impeachment and promoting the informers: Justice Cho Ramaswamy In spite of proven charges of corruption and irregularities as solicitor general, his impeachment was blocked. Similarly , current CEC Naveen Chawla was promoted inspite of clear dispay of partisanship and leaking information of confidential info to poll managers og Congress
3. Recommending Creamy layer for reservation: This too when large population of upper caste languish Below Poverty lines. Sons of MPs /CMs with assets of 1000 crores are entitled to reservation. What a mockery of social equity
2. Sharm Al Sheikh : PM Manmohan Singh delinking terror with bilateral talks with Pakistan . Even,the ashes of dead from 26/11 had not cooled off; the PM wanted to talk of trade commerce and bilateral relations with them.
1. Nomination of President’s son from Amravati : For last 2 assembly polls Dr Deshmukh had been winning this seat for Congress . I am witness to tremendous improvement he has done in this city of Maharashtra. He inspite of his fervent appeals has been sidelined to make way for President’s son. Psycophancy rules in this party and Dynasties reign.
Please write in if you know more.
Dashboards and the helluva noise about them September 8, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in Humor, India, Project Management, Satire.Tags: Accidents, Dashboards, PM tools, Project Management
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Imagine you are put into a car ,You have to drive it to a known destination. The car has a beautiful dashboard but none of them will work unless you manually update their values. How good will it be if you have to pop a dipstick inside the fuel tank to find how much fuel is there and then update the fuel meter. You go to the battery compartment, use a voltmeter to measure battery voltage, come back and update the dashboard. You go to engine compartment, measure the temperature of engine oil and update the temperature meter and so on .
This brings us to 2 major questions :
- How often should you get down from car to measure and update the dashboards ? 2 hrs? 60 minutes ? every 30 minutes ? every 10 minutes ?
- If you have to tell outsiders why your car is not driving correctly , will you have a feeling that if only I didn’t tell you every 15 minutes what my vehicle parameters are, I would have reached home by now?
Too much is being made out by various organizations on Project Dashboards. The Senior Management often believes that this is often the epicure of all project problems. Once they get dashboards, they can parade each project manager whose projects have parameters in red. This zeal of CEOs/ COO/ VPs results in passing a whip whereby once in a fortnight/ week a mail is sent to all. The Project manager stops all his activities, tells all team members to stop activites. They just do one thing, collect all metrics dump it on a spreadsheet. The sheet then is sent for consumption by the Sr Management. Once this exercise is complete, this gives a sense of superiority to management who believe that they have reins in their hands. All is good with this process only till you abstract yourself and look how in reality things work.
In ordinary/ extraordinary cases ,what is done is: A not so old vehicle of reliable make is bought, the dashboards are automated, most consumables( Fuel, radiator coolant, battery level, tyres etc) are adequately filled, the driver is suitably skilled and licensed to drive. While this is true for ensuring even VVIP motorcades; For Project management , the sponsors take an entirely tangent route. No body buys a reliable vehicle ( Project Mgt Processes viz PMBOK or PRINCE) ,) The approach followed is : They make their own vehicle ( PM proceses), Every one wants to get the metrics manually updated , the PM does all that the guys with passive car dashboard was doing . they do not ensure that the Project driver is licensed (PMP, PRINCE certified) or at times if s/he is licensed , tell them to run the project not in sync with licentiate rules but narrow current priority. The PM finally rams the project into the wall wondering what went wrong. He had learned driving projects on his own could crank the project to start and had some idea on steering and brakes too… An investigation is ordered, PM screams at management, management screams at PM, PM screams at team members ,every body thinks somebody else was to blame.
A driving parameter gone wrong has to be immediately addressed, whats needed is LIVE feed to PM on whats going wrong at that instant, not a court of inquiry once in 15 days to let a PM find out whats wrong and then non drivers telling her how she should drive.. Its time world bodies standardize the framework of PM dashboard , all project based companies embrace them and licensed PM drive all projects. Every thing good happening in the world is probably attributable to projects.
Kaminey- Debugged….. Dhen tanan August 29, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in Films and other crimes by leading Indians, Humor, India, Satire.Tags: Humor, Kaminey, Movies, Shahid Kapur, Vishal Baradwaj
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Few years back , I read one sociologist’s view on what rules ensure Bollywood success.
He started with :..rope in Star kids, get racy music 3 months before release , spread affair rumors about lead actors etc).
The last one was least evident where he suggested : Invite all jounalists to a party , and give them an envelope containing cheques of Rs 50,000 each. Once the media is full of encomiums, the opening itself ensures profit. By the time , the truth is discovered, the kill is made and producers can laugh away to bank .Coming back to current time. The formula to make chootiya (Idiots) out of audiences still works.
After reading several rave reviews, decided to see this flick with 2 friends. Here is what I wonder how the film might have been made by Vishal:
- Story : Do judwa bhai, 1 chootiya 1 haraami.. dono ke 20-25 minute ke scene.. thoda sex daalenge , 1 gaana .., Bhai- Bhai ki 1 fight, Jaalim Baap/Bhai , last mein thain thain.. sab khallas. Crime .. usme kyaa karein ? Arre kuchh idea nahi aa raha.. arre koi baat nahi Drugs ka plot use karte hain..
- Comedy : Arre saala .. iska bahut tension hai.. Hero ka diasability dikhao.. India mein log disability dekh ke bahut hanste hai.. Kisi ka dimaag kharab dikhao.. kisi ka jabaan.. Yeh hollywoood jaise dimaag nahin lagaana
- Photography : Saaala sabh kuch low light mein shoot karo.. kuchh nahi dikhega to confuse honge.. aur hamein kuchh dikhana nahi padega. Senseless editing karo aur scene bhagao.. Kisi ko samajh nahi aaya ki kya ho rahaa hai..tab tak film khallas.
- Dialog : Ek do gaali.. thoda laundiya ko bold dikhao.. saala public hamesha sochta hai ladka hi rape karta hai.. is baar different bolegi
- Climax : Is baare me kya sochna hai.. 50 saal se apun log yahi karta aaya hai.. Saara villain, police ek jagah lao aur Dhen tan an.. khoob goli.. aur public fighting se khush.. aur paisa vasool.. Apun ko Oscar best ending to milne waala nahi.. aur uske chakkar mein pic-chur ka maa behen ek nahi karne ka..
- Accessory : Arre sab ko bolo ki sabfillum magazine mein chhapna chahiye ki . abhi yeh fillum ka hero ..apni heroine ko real mein bahut bajaa raha hai.. bas itna kaafi hai.
Interestingly, i tried to search image ” Chootiya ” on web and found one titled ” Sabse bada Chootiya ” and couldnt stop laughing. Here is the image
Closing thoughts :
- Story :Vishal B ne picchle baar Omkara ke liye Shakespeare ki Othello ki kahaani maari thi.. Is baar khud Shakespear ya Coppola banne mein phat gayi hai.. par logon ko chootiya fir bhi achha banaaya hai. A movie without story praised by many .
- Music : Dhen tanan has got good beats.. the picturization is jarringly dark . Psychedelic disc light is not a novelty and worth raving. No other song is worth a mention. He should rewind his tapes of maachis.
- Comedy : Sense of comedy is totally misplaced. I hope Bollywood grows up to find better ways to make peole laugh. Making fun , lampooning people’s disability is intellectual poverty. Hope they apply thought. Kaante had much better sense of self deprecating humor . Ghajini , Rangeela had intelligent humor. Kamal Hassan was brillliant in his silent movie ( Forgot name) . Oye Lucky was ribald and This kind of humor is abysmally reproachable .
- Action scenes : Having seen shoot out @ Lokhandwala Ghajini and Ghayal, the actions scenes are (1/10)th of their quality. The guns in hands of cop look un authentic and toy like. Vishal may do well to do internship with RGV who inspite of bull shit like Aaag atleast knows how to shoot Cross fires.
- Acting : Priyanka is the saving grace. She has worked hard and looked authentic mulgi ( Marathi girl) in first half. In machine gun totting scene , she is totally misplaced, the camera work is hopeless in last scenes. This I say because I have recently seen how camera work should be in Slum dog. Shahid has been mokeying around for long.. appearing like SRK duplicate and once went to Pankaj Kapur( Father) to know what he thoughtof his acting. He said, ” Tu langur ke jaise uchhalna kab band karega , aur kab bada hoga? ” I am sure with this movie too , he wont have much nice thing to say.
The Verdict : . My actual outburst when coming out of theater. Saala is Hindustan mein akhbaar walon ka sab kuch bikta hai.( Front page, last page, editorial etc). My sister in law who is rarely critical of movies said , ” Its not worth 1 * “ Its not the villains, politicians , drug peddlers , cops or Guddu and Charlie ..but the journos/critics praising it with 4 /5 stars who are Kaminey
Indian humor at its best July 14, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in Humor, India.Tags: fun, Humor, pictures
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A picture is worth a thousand words. A humorous picture is worth at least 10 good jokes.. A collection of humorous pictures is worth 100 jokes and an hour of exercise.
I found one such collection here :
http://anatomyofindia.wordpress.com/2009/06/12/aisa-bhi-hota-hai/
Hilarious pictures. Enjoy
Why more tax rebate to women ?A budgetary crime July 7, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in India, Nationalism.Tags: economics, Indian, Indian Budget, taxation, women
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The women who work and earn more than Rs 1.5 LPA get their compensation without any discrimination. I have seen no organization in India which would pay women any less if she meets the work criteria.
Further , the women who are earning are most likely to marry men who earn even more.
Now consider a man and woman working in the same organization. Both are married and are drawing salary of Rs 2LPA .The man to a house maker and the woman to a person who earns the same ,if not more. In this case the man shelves a tax of Rs 4,000/= while the woman gives out only Rs 1000/=. She already has a surplus from her husband’s earning .
The poor man however finds it difficult to make the ends meet.
This is the bullshit which successive Finance minister has been doling out to India and no body protests. The rebate should be given on need basis and in this case the poor single earning member should get it. I do not know why it will take a genius and dozens of tax reforms to understan that rebqte should be linked to the number od depensdents an earning member has. That person’s income supports larger number of non earning members.
This simple step would ensure that we tax all those women who are earning handsomely and pass the benefit to those who really need them . Will Mr Mukherjee listen ? Probably not. Will couts take cognizance of this fallacy ? probably not. This inertia plagues our nation
Hello Rajiv Gandhi ! Whats you got to do with it ? July 1, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in Humor, India, Leadership, Nationalism, Satire.Tags: Bandra Worli Sea Link, Bridges, BWSL, Congress, Infrastructure, Mumbai, Soniya Gandhi
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Hello Rajiv Gandhi ! Whats you got to do with it ? We got a brand new bridge. Did you have a dream that you would like to see a bridge like this in Bombay someday ? If yes, the Mumbaikars have had 100 times more nightmares in absence of this. Will you kindly let us rename it Mumbai Spirit bridge? If at all you were associated with this project your contribution is very well given here.
Pyschophancy in your Congress runs deep and these days pays very well . Each time it has to exceed the previous one to secure a pie. Ashok Chavan, Vilas rao, Sharad Pawar , Pratibha have revelled in your Madam’s feet and are where they are today because of this. Once again they are at it and are dragging you in it . Sharad’s suggestion and Ashok Chavan’s seconding it reeks of scoring brownie points with Madam. Dont you think It is insensitive and incongruous to name it after you as you very rarely identified with this city?
Are you not happy and content that your dear Mani Shankar renamed Connaught Place as Rajiv Chowk? Delhi was your underbelly aint it ? My question is why should you want Sonia to inaugurate this ? Is it just because its a lasting monument ? Because the expenditure has been 1600 Crores( 5 time over budget )? Because it went 5 yrs behind schedule ? Can you be kind enough to let Major Unnikrishnan’s parents inaugurate this ? This Major if you have not forgotten 26/11 had laid down his life fighting to restore peace to it. Or should it not be a Karkare, Salaskar or Tambe’s wife. Give it a thought , the nation will be grateful to you for this generousity.
You were slained serving your party cause; trying to make a comeback after getting voted out on corruption charges. You were killed by Tigers for meddling in internal affairs of Srilanka ( When you had no business meddling there). You didnt know you will be blown away. These poor folks Major Sandeep in particular knew he may die saving his fellow soldiers and this city. He carried on in face of imminent danger to his life. Your death gave your party a sympathy wave and landslide victory. Your Madam now has unyielding grip on Indian political firmament. What have these martys got ? People have started forgetting their names. Can you prevent the nation from being ungrateful ?
You ( Gandhis) are already are a rich family with name sprayed every significant structure or schemes Just see the list of places that have been painted in love for you and your family ( Not exhaustive )
1. J N Nehru Urban Renewal Mission
2. Indira Gandhi National Open University
3. Jawahar Rozgar Yojana
4. Rajiv Chowk
5 Jawahar Aawaas Yojana
6 Indira Gandhi National Cener of arts
7. Indira Gandhi Nahar Pariyojana
8 Rajiv Gandhi infotech Park , Pune.
9. Indira Gandhi International Airport…
10. Rajiv Gandhi Bachat yojana…
The list is forever and end less
Naming everything important in nation on Gandhis is not enough to pay back your great services. We also wish to pay homage to people who died for Mumbai. Will you be kind enough this time to tell your Madam to let this thing go. The nation will repay this kindness by launching a thousand Soniya yojana, Rahul Nagar and Priyanka Space missions. Will you please talk to your brother Congressmen this one time?
Customer Slayer – An Airtel interaction June 1, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in Consumer Activism, Humor, India, Satire.add a comment
Below is the actual interaction, I had with Airtel. They had been pestering me for more than 6 months on such a small issue as ensuring that I get my bill at residential address Read on:
From: 121@airtelindia.com [mailto:121@airtelindia.com]
Sent: Monday, June 01, 2009 4:44 PM
To: Purohit, Arun
Subject: [SPAM] Re: [SPAM] [SPAM] (MOBILE NO:=99XXXX AND 99XXXXX . COMPLAIN FOR NOT CHANGING MY ADDRESS DESPITE SEVERAL REMINDERS [|BAL|996XXXXX9|10620095142|]
Dear Mr. Purohit,
Thank you for contacting Airtel.
We understand from your previous interaction dated 04 May 2009, you have expressed concern over delay in change in billing address, non receipt of bills for your Airtel number 9XXXXXXX and inability to view bills in self care for your Airtel number 9XXXXXXXX.
This interaction has been on for at least 6 months without any appreciable response.
We completely comprehend your viewpoint and sincerely apologize for any difficulty caused to you.
Fake sentiments , reeks of insincerity
We take pride in enhancing our customers with our responsive and friendly approach. It has always been our constant endeavor to ensure, that our customers are delighted by our inimitable approach.
The endeavor is not reflected in any of your actions
We would like to confirm that on checking our records the address has been updated and the same address will be reflecting in forthcoming bill dated 09 June 2009:
I seek an explanation as to why it was not done as committed for May bill. Does your deptt have any sense of responsibility and accountability ?
D / XXX XXX Towers,
Survey No .1XX/X,,
411057.
Regarding non receipt of hard copy of bills:
Please be informed that bill dated 09 May 2009 has already been delivered to your billing address and the same have been refused at your billing address. We request you to reconfirm your billing address to initiate further action on the same.
I acknowledge having received a call from the courier agency but refusal to accepts is impossible. My flat is inhabited 24X7X365 . The courier guy said he will resend but didn’t . please do not sit easy on this
Regarding inability to view bills in self care for your Airtel number 9960731531:
The concern may be due to up gradation process in our Airtel website. We thank you for bringing the concern to our notice as it has enabled us to look into details of our services. We request you to revert with the screen shot of the error page for further investigation.
The upgradation SUCK has been on for months now. Please cook up something better. For upgrade there is something called test/production environment. Something which worked earlier if didn’t work why was it not tested before going live. I hope your website is not being made and maintained by a charitable trust of web developers. The website literally stinks
However, please find below the procedure to view bills in our website. You can logon to our website www.airtel.in to view the last 3 invoices with Itemized statement at free of cost after 5 days from the bill generation date.
I am too mature to start learning how to navigate in the website
1. Logon to our website, www.airtel.in.
2. Please login with the username and the password and you would be able to view your Mobile account details.
3. Click on “Bill Guide” option
4. Select the invoice period to view the details and click on “Bill details”.
5. Click on “Itemized Call Statement” to view the itemized call details.
You can also click on “Receive bill on Email” option to receive bill in PDF format.
We request you to send a message as EBILL EMAILID MONTH to 121 (toll free) to avail any particular bill from last three months bill through email. The same will be sent to your email address within 5 minutes.
The bill through email is password protected and you can retrieve it by sending a message as “ebill password” to 121 (toll free) and it will be sent through message immediately.
For further assistance, mail us at 121@airtelindia.com.
We value your association with Airtel.
Warm Regards,
I wish to put this converstation on my blog to let people read how funny and testing interacting with customer care can be . Jai HO
BJP ki Jai Ho May 16, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in Humor, India, Nationalism, Satire.2 comments
Conntrary to Arun Jaitley’s claim that they performed poorly, I feel they have fared much better than expected and deserved.
There are not many uneducated Hindu voters in this country any more.
We can also count the educated but bereft of intelligence people in the previous category . Their nos. have fast declined
The BIMARU ( Bihar, MP,Raj, UP ) states too are not mentally BIMAR to fall prey to its stupid free rice /Gehu /Mandir lures. Also the Hindus today are not insecure enough to seek some uber kid to break somebody else’s hand.
Their hitech campaign to put advt on all pornographic sites( They know Sex only sells) too didnt help. Probably , had their top campaigners got their breasts enhanced and flaunted cleavages it woulld have been a better titillation.
Their allies are already behaving like whore; having fought election on a common plank, now they are looking for a better paying customer. The lotus which comes out of crap probably in political world is as big a crap itself.
20 -30 seats across the country roughly covers most of fascist yucks in our country. Considering this, 160 seats in Elections 09 is a great achievement. Though this is still dangerous for harmony of the country
Many Congratulations, their Gaddi in Opposition Benches is barkarar intact . They wont have to miss their slain pimp Mahajan who used to talk on Mool and Sood ( Principal and interest) for forming the govt. In absense of unrequited wish to become PM of India, their Supremo can take a vacation , lick Jinnah’s grave and pray for getting Sitara -E – Imtiaz ( High Pakistani civilian award) . He can then resettle peacefully in Sindh
L K Advani as PM ? May 7, 2009
Posted by arunpurohit in India, Leadership, Nationalism.1 comment so far
Leaving all his misgivings aside ( Baburi destruction, Jinnah bootlicking, Freeing Terrorist, Reaching Bombay to add to security problems post 26/11, ridiculous sense of history and propriety) , I wonder if he is physically fit enough for the most demanding role in the nation.
cartoon : courtesy : desicartoonist.blogspot.com
At 83 , I am sure all his teeth must be implanted replacements, lungs not powerful enough to climb 30 stairs in 5 minutes, kidneys on perennial pressure to clean the bad blood.Must have been good 45 years since he last sprinted.
Having him on helm would appear like having to commute daily to office using a 1930 model of a god forsaken car brand. Its good for a car vintage rally held once in a year but daily usage as a nation’s driver, it would suck. At his age and fitness , i wont trust him to take a dog across the busy street , let alone entrust the nation. His projection as a PM reminds me of a story written by Anton Chekov.
An old widow has her daughter’s husbandvisit her for a night . The lady wants to seduce , and in order to show the guy that she is young, she dresses up exotically and attempts chewing hard crumbs of bread. Her gums give way and they start bleeding.
His is a case of a highly power greedy lech who always had sight set on the throne but always was a misfit. Probably , out of sympathy, ” Last wish before death” he has been projected as a candidate by his party. The sulking baby finally has been given a chance which doesnt truly exist. . We will never be sure of the time he spends oscillating between hospitals and office. It feels like Sunil Gavaskar is recalled to lead Indian challenge in T20 world cup.
Same is the case with Dr Manmohan who is not fit enough to hold any office. Is there any organization in world which would employ a 75 yr old with muliple health disorders as its CEO? In an era where leadership is getting progressively younger, the state of Indian politics is stinkingly regressive.
Probably , in a country with average life expectancy of less than 60, expecting a person at 83 to lead is morbid lack of hope or obsessive compulsive necrophilia . Can we for once expect a leader without a single grey . I may be wrong , but I would expect a nation’s leader to be able to :
1. Jog a mile at least in 8 minutes.
2. Write his own speeches.
3. Dress up contemporarily
4. Know the Technologies.
5. Display good taste in sports, art and culture.
Both advani and MM will score zero in this test.
