The Paradox of Robinhood

Of all the popular fraud schemes, Robin Hood theme continues to amaze and baffle me the most.  It has defied time, mortality and eternity  and still  works in 21st century.  

Robinhood continues to be the opium of the hoi-polloi . He mesmerizes  and has a box office collection of few lakh crores as against 100 crores Bollywood craves. Lets see how it works.

A Demagogue Jholelal Fakeer who claims a peasant background, typically has a trimmed beard, a  fake 56 inch chest and may looks like the one  below. He  declares:

looter

 He is launching a WAR against the rich.  This war  will  give a  of windfall wealth (say Rs 16 lakhs in cash), to each idiot, lazy and brainless Gareeb (poor)..  Nobody will  even have to move even their ASS for.The organized loot and plunder he will do, will be distributed . Kaala dhan from kaale log will tana tan flow into to gareeb’s accounts JanDhan .

 OMFG (Oh my fucking god), this creates mammoth erection among all bhakts and dolts. .  Fakeer smiles inwards as he knows, he needs to deliver nothing. The drunken imbecile dolts are already doing Naagin dance and  high on this opium.

Pandemonium reigns. Popularity breaks the roofs…  Just 31% fools are enough to drown the remaining 69% population which can think. Fakeer grabs the power and continues to make an ass of fools

 Once ensconced, the scoundrel ( Fakeer) changes the gear. He actually does a raid and loots on the poor. In the suffering, he tells the idiots that they are doing a service to nation.  New and higher cess  emerge on every thing. Higher and wider taxes are declared. Greater curbs are put on the cash. This brings majority of money from poor under Scoundrel’s control.

  The Fakeer now starts living in  a palatial million square feet bungalow in a top metro, wears Rs 12 lakh suits, rides a fleet of BMW 750i,  flies the world in luxury Chartered planes. As a homo throws himself on any sexy male he encounters. All the while he maintains a mask of a Fakeer, a messiah and a humble peasant.

He subsequently  siphons the cash pile back to rich industrialists, bureaucrats, bankers and Pigs who were active or silent accomplishes in the fabled Robin hood raids. This siphoning is done in forms of loan restructuring, interest waivers and huge contracts (Statue making)

The scoundrels thus are Nibor Dooh (Robinhood spelled backwards) and paradoxically rob and kill the poor, not the other way as believed or perceived.

The melting of right thumb

 On either side of Indo -Pak border nowadays is being  cooked propaganda . The one that makes the respective govt look sexier..On India side, the factory of lies is made to make Modi ji look like a Rambo PM (which he is not) , on the Paki side its designed to make General Raheel Sharif look like Napoleon ( Which he cant be).
Let dissect the state, find its genesis and take the gas out of uber blown intestines of propaganda spreaders.
In my objective view, both may be  compulsively lying or telling half truths or exaggerating facts to further vested interests..

The truth is : Somewhere in between..

Media (Both electronic and print) is a whore. Its fueled by massive ad budgets of Govts ( 1000s of Crores of front page ads) but I am sad to see that Army  Officers ( Holi cows) are being used as tool to spread falsehood. Lets look at the philosophical angle to understand it and what else can be a better reference than the biggest epic of war- Mahabharata..
In the middle of the battle, Pandavs realized that they cant get better of their own warrior Guru Dronacharya. He was inflicting heavy damage to Pandavs after Duryodhan insulted him of lacking motivation to fight  his favorite pupil Arjun.
dronacharya_by_saryth
 Krishna ran out of ethical ideas to rein in Drona whose battle focus was immaculate.. The only way to get better of him was .. not to attack him physically but attack his brain.. Krishna was big schemer.. and here is the wicked plot he cooked:
“Drona loves his son Ashwatthama.  He is currently in jungle. If somehow we can fool Drona and convince him that his son is dead,  he will be heart broken and mentally upset . His inability to focus on war thereafter will break his defense. Thats the time Arjun’s arrows will find him. I suggest going to forest, finding an elephant, naming it Ashwatthama and then killing it. A convoluted announcement from a person Drona finds credible will do the trick.”
Why do all this ?  
Everyone in Pandav camp because of jumlas and lies had lost their credibility. The only compulsively truthful person was Yudhisthir and the belief was that he wont lie under any circumstances. Krishna approached him with a proposal of not telling a lie but this half truth. The announcement he was expected to make was
अश्वथामा हथो वा नरो कुंजरो ( Ahwathama has died, it may be an elephant or a human) .// Something like, we crossed the border and inflicted significant casualties, they may be terrorists or soldiers
Yudhisthir had objection to this also. He didnt want to be perceived clearly as a liar even in retrospect. So Krishna offered to get 100s of nagaadabajs to play  loud BANG – BANG when the twisty elephant/human words get spoken. The only thing Drona would hear is : Ashwatthama dead. This was the first honesty- integrity compromise by Yudhisthira.  The trick worked and next day Dronacharya was arrowed to death by Arjun.
Now coming back to claim of Surgical strikes jingoism, the nagaadas are our paid media.  The ministers of Modi ji are Jumlebaaz Pandavs whose pronouncements Indian citizens  do not trust. The forest is border across LoC  and the Ashwatthama killed may not be the terrorists claimed to be killed but monkeys or mosquitoes.
 We the citizens are Dronas and the literal “killing” here is killing our aversion to the distrust in govt.. ..  The drums being played may be the Bhaktards, moles or paid agents on social media.
 Apart from the desired outcome of killing Drona, the Dharmaraj who spoke fabricated  truth  figured out later that the thumb on his right hand had melted away.
The DGMO guy from army and the MEA guy  and who claimed the “Surgical Strike” during press conference, should in my view, should have a take care of their RIGHT thumb.
Many gullible Dronas amongst us may have already succumb..

Mrs India and the Rascal

Mr G India is on a romantic road, walking hand in hand with his beautiful wife.. They have been married for 2 yrs now . 
lovers-walk
 
Suddenly a rascal appears from behind. He hugs his wife (Mrs India) and then starts smooching her. Its not one but 17 solid smooches in 3 minutes all over.. There are more things Mr Rascal is doing but I wont go into those graphic details just for now.. 
 
Mr India is embarased. He wonders, what can he do ?
 
He knows that this Rascal, in his pocket, has a “Lambi gun“.
 
Mr India also has a gun in his pocket. Its definitely a “Bigger gun” and he is aware of it . He inserts his hands in pocket and pulls out.
 
He starts shooting, the rascal ….. not with his gun but with his iPhone 7. The 12 MP dual rear camera with telephoto lens vividly starts capturing the video. Mr India will include this in a Dossier of proof he will show to the Rascal after he is done with the act.
 
Needless to say, Mr India had also shared with Rascal, the videos of previous occasions when Rascal had smooched/ kissed and .. his wife. Its another story that Rascal demanded that he should  visit Mr India’s home and see all the areas of Mrs India’s body where there are evidences of assault i.e  love bites, bruises etc.
Mr India obliged to this request. Rascal came to India house.. did a deep inspection on Mrs India’s body. He said nothing at their house but after he went back, he declared that, the love bites, bruises on Mrs India’s body were all staged.. These a result of violent love making by Mr India himself.
 
Coming back to current molestation, Mr India  has disengaged Mr Rascal and has captured some cognizable evidences. Having done the ceremonial “CONDEMN” of Mr Rascal, he plans to make MMS of this incident and make it go viral. This will help him get condom (oops) “CONDEMN” from all the rich phamous and powerFools …..
 
The biggest dilemma of Mr India is :
 
If he confronts the molester head on, Rascal’s best friend Mr China may screw him from behind. Mr India currently doesn’t have capability to handle dual assault. His fight doctrine says, he can only handle one assault at a time..  Fight can only be with either Mr Rascal or Mr China, not both together . Apart from this, confrontation time means Mr India cant open his grocery shop and that means losing money ( A big crime for Mr Grocer India’s value system)
 
So as of now , the best course of action for him is to :
a) Cry loudly … keeping the tail nicely tucked between the legs.
 
b) Do all the talks : Something like, I will deal with Mr Rascal at the time of my chosing // This means people should not keep asking him how he avenges molestation of his beautiful wifey ..
 
c) Isolate Mr Rascal:  Get him named as a habitual molester or rapist of worst kind. Whatever is possible 😉 // At time of writing, the pet dogs of  Mr India have begun dancing/ celebrating the hints of some Phamous pholks isolating Mr Rascal. For example Mr and Mrs P  Russia have decided not to attend the party Mr Rascal has planned towards end of this month ..  

11 ways to respond to Murder of 17 soldiers in URI ( BJP ishtyle)

Uri in J&K  has seen the murder of 17 Indian soldiers. The citizens of India now seek affirmative action, if not revenge.  However, here are the 11 ways  Bhajapiyas have historically handled Pakistani issues and terror attacks. The well thought out strategy works like this
Updating the status a week after attack with prefix 24/9

Read more

I didnt chant भारत माता and I dont

11  years after I hung my uniform as an air force officer. I am trying to remember if I ever chanted “Bharat mata ki jai” when in military. 6 years across 6+ military bases I served, how many times did I chant “Bharat mata jai “?  I  can for sure say I said “Jai Hind” a million times( Average 50+ times a day). But ” भारत माता की जय ” ?  I think  ” ZERO “. This surprises me and may be it will shock 1000s of chaddi nationalists a lot more. At epitome of national service, you do not need to chant this mantra.  I am hopeful, this is not giving an idea to some jerk in Sangh HQ to wake up and destroy the beautiful salutation culture of our glorious armed forces.

Looking back on the day when I was to take oath to defend India with all my vigour even to peril of my life, I had 2 choices

  1. Take oath on Gita or
  2. Just affirm as an individual.

I chose to do affirmation. I didnt swear putting my right hand on Gita or Sita. 22 of my 24 course mates did but I believed that the commitment I make as an individual, in my full conscience and wisdom doesnt need crutch of any religion or book. I was questioned why I wont take oath on Gita though I am a Hindu? I answered that my flavor/vision of Hinduism is not congruent to everything that Gita preaches. My argument was accepted. Imagine doing this in any other religious or theocratic nation, I will be labelled blasphemist and bled to death. To me, this is the most solid idea of India Hinduism and its grandiose सहिष्णुता

Growing up, I thought the God factory in heaven(ऊपर) stopped producing Devis+ Devtas+ Maatas+ Baaps in 560 BC ( After Buddha) but reality is quite different. Today, as I see a lot of irritating jingoism on “Mata” chant. A quick search on  Bharat mata  reveals that it was first conceived in a fictitious play , Bhārat Mātā by Kiran Chandra Bannerjee . It was first performed in 1873. So, in reality is it not just another figment of imagination of this Bhodro (Baangali) playwright during British rule?. Whats so sacred about it?

The story on Bharat mata can be read here

Surprisingly, anyone can add few additional pairs of limbs, put a lion/tiger+ sun halo behind, add one  weapon in each hand, top it up with a mukut and lo, a new deviji / maataji, baapji is created. Practically there is nothing stopping imaginative folks from creating Maratha maata, Patna Maiya, Guntoor Tanni or say JhoomariTalaiya maa. All it takes in this digital age is Photoshop.  Blockheads can claim that not bowing to it is against Nationalism / Regionalism or city / Mohallaism

I agree, “Mata/Mataram” did become a battle cry for some freedom fighters but so did ” Bole so Nihal, Allah u akbar or Har Har mahadev or, Joi ma kaali or Jai Gorkhali or Chak de fatte. Everyone had a choice to pick the battle cry which galvanized folks around to fight a common battle. It was the pluralism of battle cries which allowed folks to win multiple battles and ultimately the war. Every chant served some purpose just as every color contributes to make a rainbow beautiful. Pick your own indigo or orange but dont try to shove your choice of color up somebody’s…. you know what.

I had always been critical of deification of objects in Hinduism. From पाताल (Core of earth) to पेड़(tree) to पृथ्वी(earth) to penis does everything need to be a devta? This 33 Karod devi devta concept never appealed to me but I often liked एकेश्वरवाद  –  एक साधे सब सधे , सब साधे सब जाय.

soul_concious-image-events-guide-03-04

What do these mata chants have to do with a diverse, multifaith, multi ethnic pluralistic nation like India? What does it have to do with Hinduism other than its crudest form? What objective does this kind of deification handle other than

  1. Oversimplification of some objective to align the  low intellect junta around it?
  2. Create another non taxable revenue stream (Read temples) to help Birlas / Bajajs and other wealthies to run trusts around it to convert black into white and white into silvers?
  3. Celebrate a day with some silly rituals, extort money, eat up calorie bombs, create traffic nuisance and strew the rivers and oceans with a lot of garbage ?

I am not from a religion which prohibits me to bow in front of anybody other than Allah. I am not prohibited to say Jai to anyone.  As a free thinking man, my intellect revolts at mindless and reckless devification. Its utterly obnoxious to have a devata of every kind popping in front of me randomly from anywhere/ anyday expecting genuflection. I just wont do it. If a person like Javed Akhtar transgresses his religious bounds and chants Bharat mata, its his conviction and freedom to do it. If Owaisi doesnt want to say it, shouldnt he have the liberty to do it? Why should someone call him a a pig for it?

Why we debase the profound vedic shloka – जननी, जन्म भूमिश्च , स्वर्गादपि गरीयसी ( Heaven is found in the lap of mother and land of birth). Please note the usage of जन्मभूमि not मातृभूमि

We need to create more robust belief and value system around Nationalism and Hinduism in particular which can stand the onslaught of any critique or rational inquiry. Continuing to believe in ugly dogmas, stupid rituals and irrational beliefs or practicing them makes a mockery of your own intellect and our highly evolved religion.

Advantage Hinduism is: Its not driven by the communication someone received secretly in a cave. It does not shut down free constructive thought(शास्त्रार्थ) . Its not constrained or limited. The buck does not stop at any book. Not even Gita or Ramayana or Vedas can claim to be all encompassive of what Hinduism stands for. Its beautifully non prescriptive religion. It encourages you to be a contemplative and free thinking human. Empathy is what has kept this faith relevant.

आत्मनः प्रतिकूलानि परेषाम न समाचरेत.

If you wont like someone else’s ideology/faith thrust on you, do not thrust yours on them. If Hinduism could survive 600 yrs of murderous Islamic rule and 200 yrs of missionary lure, it can very well withstand ugliness emerging from within, in form of Sakshi maharajs, Amit Shahs or Muttaliks. We can evolve, we can mutate, we can create new releases, versions of our faiths, we need not create more gods, more maatas and baapas.

Recently, I was evaluating a very large enterprise software (U$ 100 Mn+ type )  for redesign with a project sponsor.  She told me – “ Everybody added a lot of crap on this software whenever they felt like but no one bothered to clean it up ever. So what you see is a lot of junk all around which makes little sense “ .. Same I believe is the case with Hinduism as a religion. Everybody when they felt like added their bit of crap, no body ever cleaned it up. So here we are with a lot of junk.

If you wish to start on some introspection of Hinduism as a faith, a good point to begin may be here :

 

 

 

5 Virtues of intolerance

Probably this is the only period in history of India when the self esteem of Indians and particularly Hindus is at all time high. They shouldn’t go apologetic about it  ” – The Benjamin Netanyahu,  PM of Israel observing  the mood of India in 2015

The demagogues however have been drumming up despair on the growing assertiveness of Indian citizens and also the government. The self denigration of centuries leading to massive leakages out of faith, out of admiration of Christians ( During and after British rule to get closer to Saahebs) and fear of Islamic rulers ( Sword or oppressive Jazia) have been arrested.  Its at this time, the Commies, the casteists and Congis are becoming increasingly irrelevant and their masters have begun painting ” Intolerance” as an ugly word. Their only resort to relevance is nuisance.  I did a deeper gaze on the word and realized that the word or philosophy of  ” Intolerance” is as neutral as fire we fear and worship. We use fire to keep house warm,  we use it to cook food and we can also use it for destruction. Just  as fire is what you make out of it, so is intolerance. Lets see 5 examples :

  1. Steve Jobs : The biggest entrepreneur of all time was highly intolerant of incompetence and inadequateness of compelling User experience. It was his intolerance of anything but the perfect product design which created superlight Mac book Air, a superb music storing iPod, a highly intuitive iPhone and a ubiquitous alternative to laptop in form of iPad. Just imagine how ugly the world would have been if Steve had not been intolerant.stevejobsadobe

 

  1. 2. Defense forces : The militaries across the world ( Except Pakistan off course) are extremely intolerant of indiscipline. You break the discipline and you get more than commensurate punishment. The punishment of treachery is “Death” . Offensive behaviour is immediately dealt with by Courts of Inquiry, charge sheeting, Summary trial and Court martial if required.  Conviction  or exoneration is swift and time bound. The judges in military courts are not as tolerant of stupid arguments as civil judges.   They do not let Salman Khans  litigate for decades and  shake their asses while justice weeps indefinitely.   Its this intolerance for inefficiency which makes military highly efficient not only in war but also in floods, earthquakes or  even rescuing a little Prince from a borewell.130834315

 

  1. Aviation industry : Recently, I tried to reach Bangalore airport for an evening flight. Owing to peak traffic, the looters Olas, Ubers were quoting 3.8x surge fares . This meant I would pay Rs 4800/= for a taxi to airport when my flight ticket to Pune cost only 2100/= . I was intolerant of this loot and took a private cab. He drove like Schumaaker to try to help me catch flight in time. The checkin was supposed to close at 1745 and I reached the airline counter at 1747( 2 minutes late) . The staff tried to help me out . She spoke to the captain of the aircraft but he was intolerant. He said , ” Manifest has already been prepared, I wil not accommodate“. I was disappointed and sad but then, thought about the intolerance to breaking rule which is integral to the field of aviation. If they become tolerant to lapses and violation of aviation standards , only by luck, millions of passengers would land on earth alive. Aviation industry whether civil or military is extremely intolerant even of excess body weight of air crew. Even a few glasses of beer by pilots, the night before may debar her from flying.  Its this intolerance to transgress  that makes flying trustable.

fLYING

  1. USA on terrorism : The strongest nation on earth ( Economically and militarily) is extremely intolerant of possibilities of terrorism.  It has learned its lessons from one of the ghastliest attack of 911. Now, if you enter US, whether you are a sucky Bollywood Badshah or a  glorious former President of any other country , if the safety of country is to be ensured, you have to stand naked for inspection. Diplomacy be damned, there is no tolerance on safety procedures.  Its this philosophy of intolerance which has ensured that not a single terrorist attack has happened in US in last 14 years after 2002.  Tolerant nations kept on having 2611, parliament attacks and Pathankots.

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  1. Human body : Try infesting your body of rotten food, excessive alcohol or over eating , your stomach will immediately tell you how intolerant it is. It will make you vomit. Check how the whiteblood cells of your body are intolerant of  bad microbes. They  show no sympathy or tolerance to harmful bacteria who enter it and chant slogans of its barbadi. It kills them and ejects them as pus.  Its the intolerance which the human body shows to ill intentioned constituents which keeps it alive. The only time, the human body becomes tolerant to harmful elements is when it contracts AIDS.  Its immune system collapses, the microbes can rejoice ” Body ke tukde tukde honge Insa allah, insa Allah” .  The body is on death march then. If life has to sustain, body has to be extremely intolerant of such elements

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Conclusion :   The world ‘ intolerance’ has got a lot of bad press courtesy #Presstitutes funded by Shaikhs of mid east and and also commies/congis putting their entire weight behind it. Vedic philosophy tell about the genesis of action : Manasa ( Thoughts) -> Vacha (Speech) -> Karmana ( Actions) .  Offensive actions, ugly actions do not appear out of thin air. They have their roots in Thoughts, it takes existence in forms of speech and manifests in form of action. If you have to eradicate Bad Karma ( Actions) ,you need to eliminate bad speech and ugly thoughts.  The “Right” folks in the country are turning apologetic,  in face of barrage of media onslaught. They  are trying to establish that there is no ” Intolerance” or trying to confront folks who call India intolerant . This, I  think is retrograde and defensive. I urge each one of us to be assertive , enunciate what we are intolerant about.  Before that , lets base our intolerance on very sound benign principles. Garv se kaho – ” Hum intolerant hain

intolerant

Ugly Modi

Today there are things which makes me fill with disgust about the person who leads my nation

1.  Section 66A : This ugly section of IT act of India was drafted by Kapi Sibal..  It allows govt to arrest any person if s/he expresses herself in social media and the expression is found to be offensive. When  this was implemented, Modi had changed his profile picture to black. Calling it as draconian as an emergency. A year passes and he is in power, he deploys his entire legal battery to retain this ugly law. The solicitor general pleads for keeping sec 66 legal but thank god Supreme courts kills this calling it violation of freedom of speech. What a creep this man is

Self obsessed narcissist

2. Disgusting dukanwalla :  Pakistan extended an invite to Indian govt to attend celebration of Pakistan day in Delhi as per protocol. Pakis immediately broke the  protocol by inviting the scoundrels of Kashmir to the event. The same suckers who wish to secede from India and break the country. At this sacrilege, there was no need for govt of India to go and follow the ugly protocol of still attending the meet which gives legitimacy to traitors. He forced Gen V K Singh to go and attend this ugly  event though he didnt want to .  All just because he can do some little kaaro bar with this terrorist nation?

2 lines  from a poem by Ramdhari Singh Dinkar are very apt

Swatantra garv unka jo nar-fankon mein pran ganwate hain
par nahi bech man ka prakash roti ka mol chukate hain…

( Those are entitled to pride of independence who starve to the death

But dont sell their conscience to pay the price of getting a bread )